The reason why I don’t blog much these days is that I am writing a book. Haha. No shit. It’s called “Glitter and Tears” and in the future, I’d like to share bits of it on my blog. Before I do so, however, let me introduce this little attempt at a book of mine.
Why “glitter and tears”?
The title not only represents the two poles of the main character’s personality but of life as it is. I often think about how sad it is that the world is black and white. You’re either happy or sad. Healthy or sick. Good or bad. Alive or dead.
But I don’t think the world is black and white. Or should be. It strives to be full of colours, only us – people – turn it either black or white with our one-sided thoughts. For more than a year now, I’ve had this thought in my head. If everybody has a purpose in life – a trace he or she leaves on this planet – what is mine? Usually, our genetic codes, beliefs, thoughts and memories remain embodied in another person – our child. But I don’t believe having children and helping save the population is our only purpose. We should also attempt to make a change. And if I was to contribute to a change – it would be the change of people’s black and white thinking.
I want to do so via this book.
The main character’s life, in fact, is black and white. She suffers from the bipolar affective disorder, she’s bisexual, has both feminine and masculine features, her whole life revolves around extremes.
Her life is like day and night. During the day, she’s worried about the night, at night, she doesn’t see the day coming. In the night, she’s wallowing in the darkness unable to get up and turn on the light.
People tag her as weird and unpredictable. Being happy and cheerful one time and sad and miserable another time makes her look immature, unpredictable, unstable, pretentious, deceitful, suspicious, fake… And yet, she doesn’t let her bipolarity define her.
In a nutshell, it is a story about a girl who fights stereotypes, judgements and close-mindedness by living a life on the edge. It is a story that is – just like her life – both amusing and fun but also painful and sad. But more than anything, it is a story about finding love. Not only a romantic kind of love but love in the purest sense of the word – love as the fundamental principle of the human race.
I do not know whether I’ll ever finish it. I don’t know whether someone will ever publish it if I do. But if the book ever hits the shelves of bookshops, I think it’s only good it will happen in Slovakia. Because I think that people here need a scapegoat. Someone who would challenge their moral philosophy. Someone who would sacrifice their reputation to open their eyes. And I want this to be Mila, the main character of the book.